Contrary to popular belief, not all babies are cute. Sometimes it takes a little while for a baby to grow into their cuteness. The series Seinfeld had a popular episode where the cast visits friends who are new parents only to find the baby isn’t so cute. They fumble over what to say until a doctor quips the baby is “breathtaking”.

Now of course it would take a callous, stone-hearted person to turn to new parents, the mom in particular and tell them their bundle of joy is ugly. But sometimes, you’ll freeze up, not knowing what to say or comment. So here are a few tips.

1. Lie

Ok, you may think telling a lie is wrong, but consider this more of a fib to spare everyone’s feelings. Just say he or she is beautiful and move on.

2. Indicate you’re speechless

Hey, just like mom said, if you can’t say something nice, say nothing at all. So simply gaze upon the child and declare yourself “speechless”.

3. Use an interjection of sorts

Simply say “wow!” or “it’s a miracle” or “oh my god”. If you keep repeating it the proud new parents will likely chime in to agree with you, “yes, she’s a miracle.”

4. Tell them how lucky they are

You can often divert attention by complimenting the parents on creating a “bundle of joy” or a “healthy-looking baby”. Or simply say it looks like the perfect mix of them both.

5. If you cringe, wince, or make any face

Blame your grimace on stubbing your toe on the crib or bad gas pains and then excuse yourself to the bathroom. Or declare yourself jealous and sad that you can’t have such a wonderful baby too.